Lost it...

My voice is gone. Lost into the deep void until it is able to return to me.  Cant really make any sounds louder than a whisper

What can I say ... I like to torture myself. Though hopefully Master will take that over for me

Good side is I was able to narrate The Diary of Mister Welldone without having to edit the sound of my voice

Hope Master isnt mad at me because I pushed myself too much

Shake It Eyes...

Yep checked the lyrics and they are saying shake it eyes...

Not sure if its just incorrect English or else some people like people that shake their eyes (idk)

Just gonna sit here with my mouth half open and gawk at these Asian gods... Though I have the best, most supreme Asian god ever <3

Also these allergies are messing up my sleep pattern...

Didnt realize it but I was feeling blahhhh so I laid down at around 10am and didnt wake up till 9pm...


Brings me back to the days when I was younger I would get horrible bronchitis every year because of my allergies... Also being highly allergic to any type of berry... Yeaaaa!!!! That time I was unknowingly playing in a bush that has berries in it and I came home with my face so puffy I looked like a teddy bear... Sadly my mom doesnt remember that...

But she does remember that time the doc gave me some liquid medicine for my bronchitis... The pharmacist my mom worked with thought it would be a good idea to add grape fruit flavoring because the medicine had a bad taste... Well it ended up smelling like Fresca but tasting like vomit and it tasted so horrible I would fight her when she tried to give it to me... Im not longer able to drink Fresca without gagging

No job yet...

Keep putting in at least 4 applications a week but nobody ever calls me back. This is so frustrating

I know Master is in college and college students have no money so Im not even gonna ask him to help pay for my plane ticket to see him. I know I should depend on him but I have never been the type of person to ask for help. Im the type of person that will struggle and never ask for help. I was even like that as a kid in elementary school

Back to normal

I feel back to my normal self now... I hate it when Im PMSing. Im not sure if I did the right thing in pushing my Master away but I didnt want to say anything to him that I didnt mean.

I also hope that he understand what PMS is and that I didnt purposely push him away

Women are complex...

When feeling lonely  you would think that we would want to talk to their loved ones but noooo... I need to be left alone in fear of saying something stupid  that I dont really mean

I just feel so drained right now I cant deal with other people. Its like I have nothing left to give

Also the thing about me masturbating by myself I never get any pleasure out if. I only masturbate if told to and its all for Him. I have always been like that. Like Lady Gaga said I was born this way

Venting

Every since a few days when my Master got on my case about not being with him it seems like he has been very distant. I know he has class and work but we hardly ever talk anymore. I feel emotionally drained because so far I have done so much for him while he seems to be giving me minimum effort.

I know its different now that he took me back but I miss our talks and seeing his face. I dont think he realizes how I feel without him and its hard to put in words Hell ever since I realized I was a slave and was willing to give my life over to another person my emotions have been crazy. I know I need to be patient and I dont want another Master. I just would like one message a day so I know he still thinks about me a little and is still alive.

I know its supposed to be all about him but what about when Im unhappy and feeling neglected...

I need to buy more tissues because Im almost out again